Do you use a Bidet or a Widget?

floating-ring-160536__180Our Hero, Sam, is the King of malaprops

Acquaintances think he is quick and clever – the adroit way he twists words and creates images. His friends – aware of his penchant for problems with dangling participles and sentence structure, laugh softly and shake their heads  with images of Yogi Berra dancing in their heads.

A simple sample of Sam’s malaprops:

  • A rolling stone gathers no moths.
  • Toni said she couldn’t eat crabs or any other crushed Asians. (crustaceans)
  • We have no delusions to the past.
  • You could have knocked me over with a fender!
  • You lead the way and we’ll precede.
  • Good punctuation means not to be late.
  • Having one husband s called monotony. (monogamy)
  • The flood damage was so bad they had to evaporate the city.
  • Mommy says the monster is just a pigment of my imagination.
  • Everybody at Google has their own cuticle.

Today, Sam had the Wine Bar roaring when he admitted he used the French Widget at the hotel in Paris.

World’s Best Widget

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