Trixie started out as a Baton Twirling Barbie in Junior High. The Team was: Blondes only, high pony tails, shorts skirts and deft skills at Baton. Her cadre travelled all over the state competing. It was rare that the girls did not come home with the gold, silver or bronze.
In high school, Trixie joined the cheerleaders and stole the show with her gymnastics and Baton-moves thrown in for extra dazzle. While many of the other girls were blossoming, Trixie was tall, thin and thanked God and Victoria Secret for padded bras. Her high school graduation gift from her very cool grandmother, Channell, was breast augmentation surgery.
And so it began, over the moon-excited by her new figure, Trixie caught the bug. Her fairy grandmother (“Call me Channell, in public”) with the thigh-high boots, blonde extensions, short skirts, low cut tops and a perpetually surprised look on her taut face (a result of years of “touch ups”) “treated” Trixie to a nose job and a chin lift for Christmas.
After a stab at junior college, a new modelling agency ‘signed’ Trixie – now 5’9, thin, permed and very-dyed blonde hair cascading to her waist. Channell was her ‘agent.’
A well known TV show was looking for new talent and Chanell had a brilliant idea for Trixie- she hired a voice coach to help Trixie to learn a song
The delightful lyrics were what the judges were looking for – All American, good girl:
“…I feel pretty..
… Oh, so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any girl who isn’t me tonight… “
Trixie may have been pretty, but she could not carry a tune in a bucket.
For two weeks she tried to learn the song, sing the song, say the song, mime the song- to no avail.
The high notes where too high – she could never reach “witty” wihout her voice cracking.
Flummoxed, Channell decided “Dancing with the Stars” was more appropriate for once Trixie, now Trisha.
Let the dance lessons begin…