To Err is Human – to lie is bad…really bad

The King was in the Counting House counting all the Rubles..


Sing a song of six guys

A pocket full of wry…

Four and twenty senators
Involved in a scheme.

When the scheme was opened
The News Anchors  began to sing;
Wasn’t that a Gotcha dish,
To set before the king!

The king was at the Golf Course
Counting all his Rubles
The queen was in the parlour,
Eating Blini, Pelmeni and Knish

The aid was in the garden,
Whiting out and deleting  files, documents, secret papers

When down came an FBI undercover whirlly bird
And pecked off the news.

Real News, Actual Factual, Authenticated, UnBiased, Professional News



No one told them about high tide

Every five years, a tsunami hits.

Rober and Laura were tired of City living and were at the point, they would do anything to get away from the noise, pollution, the density and the filth.

They attended a wedding on the island and fell in love with the sky, the water and the solitude. Their real estate agent swiflty found a newly built home, put the sales package together and was off on a trek to Himalayas. 

Laura could not have been happier. She carefully unpackced their belongings before they had to travel to Egypt for a month-long meeting about Climate and Change.


The night they returned to their beautiful new home –  there were strong winds, then rain.

Rober said he had never heard a noise like the one that rumbled outside their home that night. It sounded like a train – a massive train – traveling at high speed. WIthin a minute they heard the ocean barrelling towards their home.






Revenge is his middle name

PicMonkey Collage-10

The Alabama boy

In grammar school, he was not athletic and played a little kickball- not that well. He was a “square” and a nerd before his time

In high school, he had three friends whom he had lunch with with every day and they talked about science and radio shows.

His cousins from Kentucky called him “Alabama-mama’s boy” which he hated and plotted revenge.

His parents couldn’t afford college, so he earned three scholarships and worked on campus to earn his keep.

He noticed no one ran for student government, so he ran for Vice President of Student Body and won by a landslide. He spent the summer reading Robert’s Rules of Order and turned into a bossy-know-it-all and an outspoken rule keeper. Generally, he was relatively invisible by the entire student body.

Senior year, he Met Cheryl, a plump, Home Ec major – in college to earn her M.R.S. She liked him. They were married the following year.


He heard a lot of guys were going to law school – so he followed suit. While certainly was not popular by any stretch- he became very good at finding positions at that nobody else wanted and signed up. Slowly, he rose through the ranks. Many remarked he was a pain in the neck or like a burr under your saddle,’ just plain disagreeable

Movin’ On Up Eventually, the couple moved to our nation’s capital where he landed various positions in government.


Flash Forward: Cheryl burned her apron,  got a perm, joined Weight Watchers and was the poster girl for WW success. She dabbled in Bridge, abstract art and pottery.  She was noticed and invited to  a play tennis with the other wives.  It turned out she was tennis natural and began to flourish. Both on and off the tennis court.

And then it was: The Affair.

Anybody will tell you that Washington DC is a very small town. And people are wont to gossip… and gossip flourishes.

In 1986, Cheryl met very handsome politician, her husband’s nemesis,  who pursued her.  They met at the famous Watergate Hotel for several “afternoon indiscretions.”

Hitting the fan

When he found out about his wife, he was incensed – the only that she cheated on him but that it was with a man he loathed and detested. The word spread  like wild fire. She divorced him. He called her ‘damaged goods.’ No one would ever call him a gentleman.

 An all out war commenced as he  vowed to wreak havoc upon his opponent.

The two were mighty opponents always arguing over bills – for decades they fought. When said Cassanova hit on Alabama’s second wife – apoplectic only begins to describe the rage and indignation and desire to decimate “HR.”

His best friend was Young Boozer. Boozer’s father was no help.

Slowly, methodically, he soldiers on.



Former Poseur Speaks out


At one point in time, the famous director had more pretensions than good sense.

Alfred Hitchcock (Hitch)  had a lonely and sheltered childhood that was worsened by his obesity…Later on, he was asked to leave leave the military due to his size, height and an unnamed medical condition.
The Woe is Me Boy muddled about for a minute …

Until he tried his hand  at creative writing – he became a prolific writer – and thereafter got involved inthe production arm of Paramount Pictures at Islington Studios. Ta Da!
Hitchcock directed more than fifty feature films in a career spanning six decades and is often regarded as the greatest British filmmaker.

He is famed for saying: “Luck is everything… My good luck in life was to be a really frightened person. I’m fortunate to be a coward, to have a low threshold of fear, because a hero couldn’t make a good suspense film.” 

Sir Alfred Hitchcock is seen here with famed San Francisco columnist, Herb Caen, prior to the release of the movie “The Birds.” Caen was famous for calling pigeons “rats with wings.”

The two posed for this picture on a bench in Union Square.



First date: what are your Top 10 Questions?


A crumpled piece of binder paper on a table…

The couple were seated in the window of the downtown coffee shop. They both looked as nervous as a couple of a first date.

She was sitting up straight in the chair, smiling – in a strained, artificial manner. He, too was sitting erect. However, he was playing with the salt and pepper shakers – lightly pushing them left and right – avoiding eye contact.

She took a piece of paper out of her purse and explained something, and handed him the paper. He slowly took the paper, unfolded it and studied it. She stared – waiting for a reaction.

The man studied the paper and a smile crossed his face. He began to laugh. She looked confused. He pulled a piece paper out of his jacket pocket and handed it to her. Seeming perplexed,she scanned the paper. She laughed and crumpled the paper into a ball. They both were laughing loudly as they left the coffee shop. 

After they left, the other woman in the restaurant and I exchanged a look. I got up to retrieve the wad of paper. Here is what it said:

Top 10 Questions for a First Date

  1. How does love and affection play a role in your life?
  2. What is your favorite and most treasured memory?
  3. What’s one thing you’ve done, but will never do again?
  4. Who’s your best friend?
  5. . Who do you think knows you the best?
  6. How often do you talk with your parents?
  7. Name one of your biggest fears.
  8. Are you employed? Where?
  9. What do you value the most in a friendship?
  10. Do you think your childhood was happy or sad?

Never underestimate the power of questions.



Look before you leap into long distance dates


Leaving on a Jet plane?  Think Twice: Long Distance Dates 

Katie was smitten. She met Romantic Robert on a popular dating site. His photos, funny observations and pictures of his new Porsche overshadowed the fact that he lived two time zones away. She said she loved his writing and all his pictures. She shared many of his passions (cars, Mad Max and 600 count sheets) Truth be told: she was hot to trot. Katie had been in and out of too many sour relationships and was ready for fun, romance, and passion.

After a handful of emails, they spoke on the phone. He was a big flirt, and he said, “Come to Atlanta, Sugar – I’ll show you the town.” (Notice: he didn’t say, “Let me buy you an airline ticket and I will graciously pay for your hotel room.”) Her friends told her to slow down, to ask more questions, to Google the guy, get to know him – more than via text messages, emails and a few phone calls.

She wanted to go the distance

She had tons of frequent flyer miles, her cousin lived outside of Atlanta, and she was confident that Robert was all that he claimed to be: single, a long distance runner, a gourmet, a CPA, and a Tulane graduate.

Take a page from this book

Katie’s expensive lesson is a lesson for one and all. She threw caution to the wind and flew to Atlanta against all advice from friends and colleagues. He met her at the airport with flowers, which didn’t disguise the fact that he was much heavier than his photos; he drove a Ford truck (the Porsche was in the shop) and took her to TGIF’s for dinner.

He drank two Long Island Teas while she sipped a Diet Coke. Initially, Robert was a charming Southern gentleman, by the second drink he was a boor. His active flirting with the waitress was the crowning blow. She excused herself, and on the way to the ladies room, asked hostess to call a cab to take her to her hotel.

She graciously informed him that she was going to her hotel and she would call in the morning. He protested. He suggested she stay at his house. He wanted know the name of her hotel. She kissed him on the cheek and left. The long, expensive cab ride to her hotel gave her plenty of time to dissect her experience with Robert.

Her friends had been right. She had moved too quickly and made an expensive mistake. She called her cousin and arranged to see her the following day. She would send a polite “Dear John” email to him and end that chapter.


Top 5 Tips for Long Distance Dating

Long distance dates are rife with challenges. Be safe, be smart and plan ahead.

  • Always stay in a hotel. Can’t afford a hotel? Don’t go.
  • Never, ever stay in the other person’s home.
  • Upon Arrival: Take taxi /rental car to get to and from the airport. Never, ever get into a car with someone you’ve never met. Can you say Ted Bundy?
  • I’ve got a secret: be sane: There is no reason to reveal the name of your hotel until you are 100% certain your date is a Boy Scout. (Trustworthy, loyal, honest…)
  • Keep Safe: It’s a date, not a fashion show. No jewelry required. Keep your valuables in the hotel safe. Or at home.
  • Tell All: on every first date – in San Francisco – or out of state – be sure to inform several friends/family where you are going, staying, and the name and address of the person you are meeting. Yes, even coffee dates. Tell a friend.


Can you Afford this Date?

You do the math. Figure it out: roundtrip plane ticket, taxi to and from hotel, meals, and hotel charges. Then tabulate how much time are you willing to spend on a long distance romance? Katie used to say “All the good men in San Francisco are taken.”

She changed her mind before she landed at SFO.

Lesson learned. Look ( Google the Guy/Gal) before you even begin to Leap.